Being a Father at 40
I’m going to drop a small story here, and some advice for the younger male generation that might need it. If your wife, girlfriend, or fiancé comes into the bedroom at 5am and asks if it\’s ok to turn the light on, there is a pretty good chance that it is important. This is exactly what happen to me unexpectedly, without warning, and with many other thoughts and feelings attached to it. I\’ll spare you the many details, and get to the point that some can relate to. There are a great deal of guys out there that may not exactly have fatherhood at the top of their to-do list at age 40. Things will change, people will change, and situations will change. Some things will be GREAT, some completely AWSOME, and others, will take time to adjust to.
Being a few months into this journey I can only speak on what I know thus far, and what I will have figure out. What started out as recipe and travel blog will transform into something a little different, or least added to. Here are a few things to keep in mind at the beginning of this incredible journey.
You are never fully prepared, no matter what anyone will tell you.
Things will come up in your day-to-day life and work schedule that will require your immediate attention. Doctor’s appointments, shopping necessities, and squeezing your closet space down are a few.
There are things that you have to give up.
You will slowly realize that there will be things that you will need to sacrifice, and other things will need to accommodate. Poker nights will be few a far between, date night with your spouse will be last minute, and your laundry will built faster then ever before. This is all your new reality.
There will be questions about your abilities.
Your first thought might be \”I\’m, going to be almost 60 when this child graduates’ high school\”. \”Will I be active enough for my child?” Meaning will I be able to go outside and throw a football with my son, or take my daughter to the roller-skating rink?” At 40, for me, something squeaks or cracks every morning when I roll out of bed. Get active, get outside, because you will need it!
Do some documentation.
Document memories and moments along the way, but everything that you do doesn’t need to be documented on social media or shared with the world. Some of my greatest memories of my childhood were a printed picture, knick knack or a small note that I came across years later.
Take time for yourself.
This means that you will need to take moments out of your own life to appreciate what\’s before you. Take some time to do things that you enjoy. Take a walk, hit the gym, or read a book. Currently reading Dude, You\’re Gonna Be a Dad. I\’ll let you know how it is. 🙂
Lean on your people.
When your 40 years old, not everything is going to be a easy as it is for a father that might be 27. There are still things that I see on social media, and I have to stop and ask, “What does that mean?” Get your support from close friends, family, and then find a smart person (maybe a millennial), that can help you understand some of the technical stuff that kids these days are doing. Many things will have changed from your generation but surround yourself with those individuals that are supportive and encouraging.
This is all that I have for you thus far, but there is surely more to come. This is going to be a great journey, so if you are reading this, I wish you the best of luck and encouragement. There is a good chance you will need it.
*It’s late, I’m going to bed.